This post was written by Sakshi Kapur. PsyD, PPG - Psychiatry.
August brings more than just the promise of fall, just around the corner. It signals a return to routines, school bells and early mornings. For children and teenagers, the transition back to school can be both exciting and overwhelming. Whether they’re starting kindergarten, entering high school or simply adjusting after a summer of unstructured freedom, the shift can bring emotional, academic and social challenges.
Here are six ways caregivers and educators can support a smooth, healthy transition back to school.
No. 1 – Openly talk about their feelings about returning to school
It’s normal for children and teens to have mixed feelings about starting school. While some might feel excited about returning, others might feel nervous or scared about the prospect of being back in that environment. Every feeling is valid!
A few things parents and caregivers can do to help children feel emotionally prepared to be back in school are:
- Open the conversation about school and ask them how they feel. Acknowledge their feelings, whether positive or negative, and validate their emotions. That reassurance will go a long way toward making them ready for their first day back!
- Talking about their feelings will also help them set realistic expectations about what it will feel like to be back in school. Parents can use this time to model managing mixed feelings by sharing their own experiences and telling them that they are not alone in feeling this way.
- Emphasize the fun aspects of school — seeing friends, learning new things and engaging in fun activities. This would also be an appropriate time to reflect on the child’s past successes in situations that required them to be brave and adapt to changes and transitions.
No. 2 – Ease back into routines
Summer often means relaxed bedtimes and screen time galore. Transitioning back to structured routines takes time and can illicit mixed reactions from children, especially younger ones! Beginning with gradual routine shifts can help soften the stress of this transition.
Begin by adjusting their bedtime to be 15 to 20 minutes earlier each night until you get to the desired bedtime for them. Start doing this at least a week before school starts to help ease them into the routine of school. Similarly, try and wake them up earlier each day so their body can get used to the early start to their days as they get closer to their first day of school.
Start reintroducing daily rituals like reading before bed, setting out clothes for the next day, and a set breakfast time. This will help in creating consistency for them and ease some anxiety about returning to school by making them feel more prepared.
No. 3 – Address academic anxiety
Some students worry about grades, teachers or subjects they struggled with previously. Teens may feel additional pressure related to college, extracurriculars or social status. This could be especially true for children in special education classes, those who are neurodivergent or students who are in ESL classes. Parents and caregivers can help by:
- Emphasizing growth over perfection. Discuss the importance of putting in effort and hard work to get desired grades.
- Introduce the idea of tutoring or mentorship opportunities in order to help them feel more supported as they think about their academic goals.
- Every child is different and has different strengths! Extracurricular activities are just as important for the growth and development of children’s identities, and it is important to reinforce that and encourage them to pursue their interests outside of the classroom.
- Most importantly, let children and teens know it’s okay to ask for help from parents, teachers or counselors.
No. 4 – Support social readjustment
Friendships can shift over the summer, given the month-long break. Some children and teens may feel disconnected or anxious about reentering social circles, especially if they have not had much contact with their friends or peers over the summer. Reintroducing social activities can help ease them through this transition and make it feel less daunting, especially for children and teens who struggle with social anxiety.
Encourage reconnecting with classmates before school starts by arranging group activities or play dates. This will help them feel less anxious about meeting old and new friends during their first day back and increase a sense of familiarity.
It’s important to remind them that friendships evolve and that it’s okay to feel uncertain. This is a great opportunity for parents to model adapting to changes in social relationships in a healthy manner by sharing their own experiences and normalizing their children's worries about these changes,
No. 5 – Prepare together, mentally and logistically
Back-to-school shopping, planning transportation and reviewing schedules together can build excitement and give children and teens a sense of control over starting a new school year. This can also help ease the anxiety about being in a new classroom and having new teachers.
Involve kids in choosing supplies or organizing their space. Give them the chance to make some decisions about their supplies and what they what their lockers to look like. This can help them feel more excited about their first day back.
Visit the school ahead of time if it’s new to them to help them feel familiar with their classrooms. Parents and caregivers should also establish relationships with their new teachers and the school staff so they can stay informed about how their children are doing in school.
Talk through the first-day schedule and expectations and normalize both their excitement and nervousness about this transition. Explore what their concerns are and approach their worries from a problem-solving approach.
No. 6 – Watch for red flags
Back-to-school anxiety is normal, but it can also lead to excessive worry, sleep problems, behavioral problems or emotional disturbances that last beyond a few weeks and could potentially be a sign for deeper concerns. This is especially true for children and teens who have experienced bullying in the past.
It is important for parents and caregivers to check in regularly with their children, not just on day 1. Continue to validate feelings, and don’t dismiss prolonged distress.
Reach out to their school counselors and teachers to ask them about potential problems they might be seeing at school.
If needed, seek out professional mental health support to make sure your children get the level of care they need.
Final thoughts: Lead with compassion and flexibility, not pressure
Transitioning back to school is a big deal, and our children don’t need us to have all the answers. What they need most is patience, understanding and reassurance that they’re not alone. Every child is different, so be patient, listen to their concerns and adjust your approach as needed. The key is fostering a positive, open environment that allows your child to feel confident and prepared for the exciting year ahead. By leading with compassion and staying attuned to their needs, we can help them face the school year ahead with resilience and confidence.
